


Overflow

by orphan_account



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Hunk (Voltron) is so Pure, Insecure Lance (Voltron), Keith (Voltron) tries to help, Lance (Voltron) Has ADHD, Lance (Voltron) gets drunk, Lance (Voltron) is not depressed, Shiro (Voltron) Has a Clone, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-04
Updated: 2018-03-04
Packaged: 2019-03-27 02:15:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13870953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Comment after comment, yell after yell, scowl after scowl, Lance gives up. He’s held back his insecurities too long and they’ve gotten worse than they’ve ever been. He follows in the footsteps of his father — not Keith for once — and gets drunk. He has a well needed vent to Keith, he feels like Keith 2.0, Shiro won’t listen to him, and the fact he just wants to go home.Something is also wrong with Shiro.





	Overflow

**Author's Note:**

> I have no idea what this is.  
> Warnings: Hints at past child abuse, underage drinking.

Lance has been so off lately. It was worrying the team. Hunk, Pidge and surprisingly Keith. Coran cares a lot but doesn’t know how off Lance is acting, most likely the same is with Allura.

By off, he spent his whole day in the training room, not eating anything but dinner. Hunk commented on him not doing face masks anymore. Pidge said if he wasn’t training, he was playing video games, he never asked her to play even though he usually does. Allura and Coran have noticed how quiet he’s been. 

 

~~~

 

Keith yawns, heading to his room before feeling a sudden wave of emotions. Red’s talking to him. 

With a turn of his heel, Keith’s running to the hanger, sliding down and running up to the lion. “Lance?”

“Keith? ¿Por qué diablos no esta durmiendo?” 

“Uh, why the hell am I not— what?”

“Sleeping,” Lance sighs, the sound of a liquid swings back.

“Are you drinkin’? What the hell?”

“I found the Altean Vodka,” Lance takes another sip. “Did Red snitch on me?”

“Yeah. He did, what’s up? I wouldn’t take you for a drinker,” Keith walks over and sits next to him. “Can I have a sip?”

Lance hands over the bottle. “Well, I need to talk to somebody, Hunk’s already passed out, Pidge’s deep in her work, Shiro is ‘sleeping’, we all know he’s just closing his eyes trying to sleep, you were training, Allura and Coran were working. And all the other lions would tattle on me. Black, yeah, right, like I’m worthy of talking to him. Green would tell Pidge, since we were teammates before this, same with Hunk, considering we’ve been best friends forever. Blue, I just. I can’t talk to her anymore, and if I could, she’d tell someone. I guess Red did too, I mean, he’s my lion now, I thought I could trust him,” Lance sighs.

“What’s up?” Keith takes a sip, coughing. “Dear god! That’s way too strong, okay here you take it,” Keith hands Lance the bottle.

“I just, I’m a morose drunk — also I often get angry — so I’m just warning you. Funny. I drink when I’m in a depressive mood, but I’m a morose drunk,” Lance laughs, taking a big gulp of the alcohol. “I’ve just been having some pretty stupid thoughts lately. Like, really stupid.”

“Care to elaborate?”

“Beta Traz.”

“Lance...”

“I told you stupid.”

“Talk to me, why?”

“Don’t take this the wrong way. But I’m sick of living in your shadow. You moving to cargo god me on the immediate wait list. You moving to fighter got me in cargo. You getting kicked out got me into fighter. I’m piloting Red for God’s sake! I can change my bayard into some broad sword! Just, gah! Why can’t I just be proud of my accomplishments and not think about what others have said to me? ‘Be more like Keith, why can’t you be like Keith?’ ‘May I remind you the only reason you’re here it’s because the top student in your class had a discipline issue and got kicked out’ I’m sick of it! I mean, I’m pretty sure I like fucking guys now too!”

“Lance slow down. It’s okay!”

He does, he takes a deep breath looking at the ground before he starts to ramble again. “I know my purpose. I know it’s important, but — as selfish as it sounds — I don’t feel it’s important enough. there’s rare occasions where you actually NEED a sharpshooter. Yeah they can come in handy but they’re not always needed. I can’t get used to the sword in battle, I’ve been trying but it hasn’t been going very well. My jokes may help the team at some points, others they are annoying and pointless because you guys don’t even snicker. And Shiro doesn’t listen to me! You listened to me and he listened to you! I can tell he doesn’t trust me enough to be the second in command! He tells me to just stay out of it, to be quiet or it’s not my call! I don’t know what I did to make him think that, well a valid reason at least. My ADHD doesn’t mean anything, it’s not a valid reason to not trust me.

Keith moves himself to sit next to Lance.

“Uh, Keith?”

“Look. Lance—”

“I mean. Why the hell would Red pick me if no one will let me do my job? Since you left, Hunk’s the only one that’ll listen to me. I’ll try and say my idea but no one will listen and we just go with Shiro’s, he’s the leader, he makes all the decisions. Sometimes I wish I was just with Blue still. Nothing to with the lions, more of the role. I’m not ready to be second in command.”

“Why is that?”

“I’m either not confident enough to say my ideas or to oppose Shiro’s idea or the others don’t listen to me,” Lance mutters. “I promised myself I wouldn’t become like my dad, yet here I am.”

“What?”

“All I need left is to hit one of you. I already smoke — smoked and now I’m drinking.”

Keith’s eyes widen. “You smoked? Your dad hit you? Lance, what’s going on?”

“I quit before the Garrison. It was only for a few weeks, I was kinda forcing myself. I dunno. And about my dad, yeah. Um. My brothers, Marco and Luis, my sister Verónica, they, they were effected more by it. I was actually the best child,” Lance laughs, “he would always say I was the smartest child, never letting my ‘disability’ stop me.”

“I thought ADHD was a disorder?” Keith smiles weakly, placing his hand on top of his lap.

“Yeah, it’s attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, but I don’t like the word. It makes me feel like something’s wrong with me and not that I’m just different,” Lance brings his knees to his chest, wrapping his arms around it. “I just need a bit of help. Like, Hunk, he makes sure to help me when he sees I start getting distracted, and well, the hyperactivetyness is just a part of my personality,” he smiles weakly.

“Lance, you could of told us about this.”

“Keith, I promise I wanted to, but when I decided I would, that’s when everything went down hill,” he takes another sip of the bottle. “But my dad was right, I was a smart kid. By twelve, I could name all the planets, dwarf planets, a decent amount of the moons, rings— uh, I knew a lot about subjects I cared about. Still do, but it’s no longer considered cute or smart, it’s called excess knowledge.”

“Dude. I can’t even name all the dwarf planets.”

“Really? Ceres, Pluto, Hauema, Makemake and Eris. And yes, Pluto is a dwarf planet.”

Keith smiles, laughing. “Yeah, I know that,” he sifts his legs, turning to Lance. “Now, don’t try and distract me.”

“You’re as bad as Hunk,” Lance stares at the bottle in his hand, taking another sip. “I’m just, I’m not fine but I’m not terrible or whatever. Y’know, everyone has bad day, right? It’s just, I have so much weight on my shoulders. I’m seventeen— or am I eighteen? Nineteen? God how long has it even been? I’m not ready for this yet. I don’t even have something that bad.”

Keith furrows his eyes brows. “What do you mean?”

“What? I left my family back on Earth! They’re safe! Pidge just found hers and they don’t even get to stay together! Think about how she feels? Shiro can’t remember jack shit! Hunk’s moms are probably worried sick and I’m turn his anxiety is probably getting worse, plus his severe trust issues! Coran and Allura’s planet was destroyed! Then you! After being orphaned since you were ten, you found out your half Galra and you found your mother! What do I have to complain about?! Missing my family? Oh boo hoo! Here I am drinking because I can’t get this voice in my head to shut up!”

Keith’s eyes widen. “L-Lance, calm down, it’s okay, we’ll—”

“No it’s not okay! I haven’t had a panic attack since I was fifteen, I’m not getting another one when I don’t even deserve it!” he says before downing the rest of the bottle.

“Okay, enough of this! Lance, you are the right hand of Voltron! The leader won’t allow you to do your job! Somehow you keep ending up in my shadow or being compared to me! You left your family back at home! Lance, you have every right to feel the way you do. It shocks me that you do, since I always wanted to be like you. Well, in the since of showing emotions. I have such a hard time reading others’ or showing my own emotions. You excel in both.”

Lance stands up, backing a bit away from Keith. “It’s just this front I put up. I’m sick and tired of feeling like I don’t matter! I do! I know I do! But Shiro won’t stop! I’m not you! I can’t be you! I’ll never get this second in command thing down! I’ll never get this sword thing down like you do! That’s not my specialty! I am the marksman! I’m pretty damn good at it! He expects me to be you! Not me! And I’m tired of it!” he turns to the opposite direction of Keith throwing the empty bottle against the wall, the shattered glass flew around, before he is collapsing on the floor and crying. His knees held tightly to his chest, arms wrapped around said knees.

“Lance, I—”

“Why is everyone so blind to my strengths? Why? I’m trying just as hard as everyone! I’m not as smart as Pidge or Hunk, but I’m still smart! I may not be as good at close range as you, Shiro and Allura, but I’m amazing at long range! I’m not as good with this fucking sword—” Lance had summoned the Altean Broad Sword through his bayard, “—but that doesn’t mean I can learn!”

Keith runs over to Lance, hugging him. “I don’t know how to explain how meaningful you are, but I can at least try and show it,” he mutters, tightly holding Lance as the bayard goes back to the docile form.

“Lo siento,” Lance didn’t try to hold back his native tongue this time, crying Spanish into Keith’s shoulder.

“Lance, I can only understand half of what your saying,” Keith sighs, rubbing his hand through Lance’s hair to hopefully calm him down.

“Lance? Keith?” 

The Cuban’s grub on Keith’s shirt suddenly tightened a worrying amount.

“Hey Shiro.”

“Is that Lance? He wasn’t in his room, I wanted, I wanted to apologize for what I’ve been saying lately. It’s no excuse, but I don’t know what’s gotten into me lately.”

“¡Vete a la mierda, Shiro!”

“Lance!” Keith opens his eyes wide.

“What did he say?”

“I’m pretty sure he just told you to fuck off,” Keith sighs, giving his brother a sympathetic look. 

Shiro rubs his shoulder. “Yeah, I kinda deserve it, don’t I?”

Lance hides his face in Keith’s shoulder still sobbing, whispering apologizes in a mix of Spanish and English.

“Shiro, don’t take it personally. He’s drunk. But, we will talk about this when he’s sober. What you have been doing is so messed up. I can’t believe you.”

“I know. I just— it’s not even worth it. Never mind. Least he won’t butt in tomorrow,” Shiro says coldly walking away.

“¿Ves? Soy un inútil para él?”

“‘See?’ I didn’t catch the rest of that,” Keith sighs, and when he gets no response, he realizes Lance is passed out. He pulls up the communicator, calling Hunk.

“Hmmm? Yeah?” the tired boy asks.

“Lance got drunk, vented to me and is now passed out in my arms. I can’t carry him, and your his best friend—”

“Yeah. I’ll be there. Red Lion’s hangar?”

“Mhmm.”

“I’ll be there in a few ticks, thank god my room is the closest to the hangar doors,” the other says before the call is cut off, and with that, the sound of loud footsteps running into the hangar is heard.

“That was f-fast?”

“As you said, Lance’s my best friend,” Hunk smiles, panting from being out of breath.

Lance makes a groaning sound, tightly holding on to Keith’s shirt.

“Here, I’ll take him to his room.”

“Uh, Hunk? Does, does Lance have depression?”

Hunk’s smile falters, “no, he was tested before the Garrison. He’s just, he’s just really insecure, I guess. He, uh, he tries to act he’s fine when he’s not, but will tell you if you ask. He told me that’s because he doesn’t want people to think he’s lying when he’s telling the truth.”

Keith looks down. “Yeah, okay.”

Hunk carries Lance bridal style into his room. Keith walks quietly behind him, glad Kolivan gave him and Krolia a few days off. Most likely because of family.

~~~

 

“Shiro, what did I do to you?”

“What do you mean, Lance?”

“What did I do to deserve this?! Ah! Ah no! Do you not understand how I feel?” Lance practically yells. “I am up here, every day, for god knows how long, wondering if Marcó, Luís, Verónica, my mom and my grandma are even worried about me, and if they are, how much have I hurt them?!

“My family means everything to me! Hunk’s close to his moms, you were close to you mother, Keith just found his, Pidge found her family, but what about me huh? I’m Latino, do you not know how close I am to my family?

“I’m not ready to be a leader, I’ve know that since the Garrison. I’m not a good second in command, you’ve made that clear as day!”

Shiro’s eyebrows fly up as the other chokes on a sob, but says nothing.

“And to say, I thought of you as a replacement of my asshole of a father. I guess not,” the blue eyes, like an ocean meeting the sky, turns into a storm, crazed waves and pouring rain as he cries.

Hunk hugs him, Lance smiles softly.

“Why can’t all of you just be like Hunk. Actually care about how others feel? Not call me the selfish! I’ve never been this bad with my insecurities! And it’s all of your fault! I can’t vent, I can’t just ask for a hug, and—”

“Lance! Will you shut up?!”

Allura seems to snap. “Shiro, I will not take this anymore. Either leave or we’ll lock you up. I will not allow you to treat your fellow paladins like this. Especially not Lance,” she scowls, her eyes are evident that she is showing no mercy.

“Oh, why not him? What does he do?”

“Well, for starters, he our most powerful paladin. He not only has three bayard forms, he very proficient in two, and is quickly learning on the third. You don’t even have a single bayard form. He makes us laugh, you make us cry. He is supportive, you don’t care about that. He is strategic and weighs in opinion, you just say and do. I don’t know why the Black Lion chose you. Lance and Keith are better at leading than you are. They can actually work together and do it,” she walks closer to him with every word.

Lance frees himself from Hunk’s hold, taking a step forward. “It doesn’t help I’m always ridiculed by you Shiro— wait. You said you weren’t— Lotor! Can Haggar see thorough others?”

“Yes, she is quite capable of doing so. My old friend— excuse me. General, Narti, was a subject to this, why?”

“That’s not the real Shiro. He told me he wasn’t himself. So either the real shiro is stuck in the lions’ astral plane, or this is a clone,” Lance narrows his eyes. “How’d you deal with, Natty— was that her name?”

“Narti, and I had to kill her. She was part of a species without eyes and saw through my mother’s old cat, Kova. I would simply suggest putting him into a cryogenic sleep until we find out.”

“Allura?”

“Alright.”


End file.
